'FOMO' ➡'JOMO' changed EVERYTHING!!
I am always the last one to go to sleep at family gatherings. My eyes will be drooping down and I know I need to get to bed and yet, I am afraid I will miss the "bonding" moment of the weekend so I fight it big time.
And if my friends or all going to something and I can't make it, oh, I feel it!
So last week was the largest psychedelic medicine conference in history (to put it in context, 12000 people attended!) in Denver and if you don't know psychedelic medicine is now a big part of my professional life. I am treating patients clinically with psychedelics, I am doing research at the University of Washington on psylocybin, and I am mentoring other clinicians in training programs. It's become a big focus.
And yes, I had planned on being in Denver but sometime in the last two months, I can't remember when, I returned my pass and decided not to go. It felt like too much this month with starting new work, launching a book and the kids ending school.
BUT...the FOMO was real. Each day, friends and colleagues on multiple text and email threads shared what they're doing there and who they're connecting with. And I started to regret my decision, multiple times.
And then I took a deep breath and literally shifted a letter. I made the F a J and then it wasn't FOMO, but JOMO (Joy of Missing Out)!
And I started a gratitude waterfall for all the good I am receiving by being here this week. And it was plentiful!
🙏🏽 I am getting a chance to wind down from travel for family and my book over the last two months.
🙏🏽 I got to attend end of the year concerts for my son's choir and daughters orchestra!
🙏🏽 I did a workshop at the residency where I worked for 20 years on my book that was so fulfilling.
🙏🏽 I had dinner with my brother alone, with no kids!
🙏🏽 I didn't have to pack or unpack, yet again!!
🙏🏽 I felt all the love and community I've built over the last 3 years in this medical community as each text flooded in.
And on and on the waterfall continued each day. Instead of what I was missing, I spent time feeling gratitude for what I was actually experiencing.
It's so simple and yet so powerful. And then something simple happened. The sadness of not being there felt like only sadness but not overwhelming or catastrophic. In fact, now I am so glad I didn't go.
Our brains are primed to look for the negative, always. It's how we survived in the wild. But it doesn't always serve us now.
So see where you can make one simple shift this week. Where can you move into what you ARE living, instead of what you are missing.
And let me know what happens!
Live well,
Tanmeet